Identity

It's been a few weeks since I've blogged, because of the whirlwind of excitement and business that hit so unexpectedly! I am incredibly grateful and blessed to have a new job that I'll be able to use my degree to love on people, help them with their struggles, and make them feel important. How awesome is that? Unfortunately, I also received some not so great news after I accepted the job offer...I am a victim of passport fraud...yep, passport fraud!

I had no idea that was even possible! My passport is neatly stacked in a safe...so, I have no earthly idea how this scam artist got a hold of it, but regardless, they have it (and my email address) and  has done who knows what with it! That's a horrible feeling...I literally feel sick at my stomach when I remember it happened! It just seems so unreal.

It's kind of ironic that I'm writing about it...especially since this is public, but honestly, I really want to warn everyone that this could happen to you SO easily. I'm going to be in contact with the Chattanooga Police Department to see if they have a packet on preventing from identity theft. Hopefully, I can prevent anything else from happening. I encourage you to do the same! You seriously can't be too protective with what you post (locations on Facebook, etc.), your passwords, or where you keep your papers with sensitive information on them. Also, think about going back to websites that you've purchased things from! Most of the time, they save your credit card information. This saves time with future check outs, but think about the damage if someone gets a hold of any information! If I were you, I would start taking any steps that I could! Don't think, "this couldn't happen to me,"...educate yourself and take those steps!

Thankfully, I have peace about this situation. No matter if this gets worse and my identity is down the drain forever, I know that my identity is in Christ. I am His and I can rest with assurance that I am his child! That identity will last forever :)

Now it is God who makes both us and you stand firm in Christ. He anointed us, set his seal of ownership on us, and put his Spirit in our hearts as a deposit, guaranteeing what is to come.
                                                                          2 Corinthians 1:21-22 

And yes, this is me (with a boy haircut and wearing WAY too many ruffles at one time). 
Happy Monday, Friends! 

Joy

This past week, I have been overwhelmed with joy. It's honestly silly how much joy my heart has felt! Even though I was sick for a few days, I had beautiful conversations with friends, the weather was lovely, spent time with family, had an amazing first wedding anniversary, and started this week out with an interview!

When you have a week like that, it's easy to feel joy...it's easy to be happy...it's easy to be thankful. This week was different though! I have never felt joy like this. I can honestly say, I believe it's because I have been utterly changed by the gospel the past few months. The real, raw, grace-giving, gospel.

Even though I have been a Christian since I was six, God has revealed himself to me in unbelievable ways the past five years, and most recently moving to Chattanooga and becoming a part of Sojourn Community Church. This growth process has been the hardest, yet easiest and most amazing process of my life. It's been beautiful and ugly at times. I've laughed, cried, rejoiced, and down right wanted to go back to childhood! All that said...I would never go back to the selfish, self-righteous, unloving, legalistic, fake person that I was. I look back and see what I missed, BUT I've realized what I have gained. I have gained the selfless, loving, merciful, grace-giving gospel! And for that reason, I am filled up to my eyeballs with joy! Not just because of circumstances, not just because of blessings, but because of the freedom and love that I have welling up inside of me. Joy goes deep. Joy can be there in any and all circumstances...good and bad...it's different from happiness. It is content and lasting!

This joy and gospel has even transformed my marriage. Since our anniversary was yesterday, I'm still thinking about our journey this past year. I can't help but be thankful for everything...for every fight, meal prepared, date, kiss, late-night talk, and the list goes on and on! I can't help but think how different our marriage would be without our growth. I've learned that the same gospel that I live every day needs to be lived out in my marriage. Meaning, I need to show my hubby the same grace that Christ shows me. I need to love him as he is. I don't need to change him. God created him and loving him flaws and all is true, Christ-filled love! I am so blessed and grateful that he loves me in those ways.  He is a gift and boy do I love him! It also needs to be lived out in all relationships! We were created to be relational! They are hard at times and you have to work at them, but that is okay! We aren't perfect...and no one else is either! Loving people well in that imperfection is part of being changed by the true gospel. THAT gives me joy!

Oh friends, I pray that you find this joy...for you to be utterly changed...for you to accept, live, and share the grace that can be given to you by Christ!

And here's a little peek from our anniversary weekend! It was so fun being tourists in Nashville! Happy Anniversary (one day after), sweet husband :) You're my favorite!

A $3,000 Wedding

With our first anniversary coming up and wedding season going in full force, I thought I would share a few of my wedding planning on a budget tips! I do want to say, not every wedding is the same, so keep an open mind and take from it what you can. Hopefully these tips will help, give ideas, or "destress" you lovely brides to be ;)

1. Make your own wedding planning book. Pull from other sources, talk with married friends. It's important to make it personalized for what you want your day to be, but still have a plan or checklist.

                                           Photo by Gretchen Lynn Robards

2. Seek out free spaces. Not all free places are outside, so think about connections or people that you know. Even some one's house or back yard can be beautiful! We were fortunate to be a part of a church plant that was renting the top floor of our old court house that wasn't really being used much anymore. It was perfect for our small ceremony!

                                           Photo by Gretchen Lynn Robards

3. You don't have to have a full course meal at the reception. Think about a fun DIY dessert bar, or involve extended family or friends that aren't in the wedding party. Have them bring y'alls favorite desserts as a wedding gift! This can even be done with finger foods! Our family brought our favorite desserts (thanks to my sister-in-law for this idea) and then we had a candy station for the favors! This was also a wedding gift ;)

Photo by Gretchen Lynn Robards

                                           Photo by Teia Squires Fuller

4. Seek out talents. Do you have a friend or family member that can decorate? See if they would mind helping you as a wedding gift or for a reasonable price that fits in your budget. *Print off pictures, draw diagrams. This will help achieve your ideas and themes. Do you know someone that is gifted with musical talents? Check out people in your church! Chances are, you'll already know their level of talent! Same thing goes for someone to run the sound system or coordinate the day! You definitely need someone to tell people where you want them to stand and when to enter! Hey, you might even know a DJ or videographer! We also knew someone in our church who baked cakes on the side and she did a fabulous job on our cake! Don't be scared to ask! We budgeted a small cash or special gift for people that helped with the big things like the decor, music, and cake.

                                                Photo by Gretchen Lynn Robards

5. Only buy what you can't find or don't have! We had an antique theme, so naturally, we went "picking" at our grandparent's houses. Not having an antique theme? Seek out brides you know in your community. Ask to borrow items. If they are uneasy, pay a small rental fee that can be given back after returning the items. Even check out online wedding blogs that sell previously used decor! Wait until you have exhausted all your options and gathered what you could, then buy what you need. Look for half priced weeks at places like Hobby Lobby! It'll save you a lot! I was blessed by the most amazing decorator ever, my second mom growing up, and she had lots of things from a previous wedding for us to use in addition to our family's things and old photographs!

                                                   Photo by Teia Squires Fuller

6. Delegate. Don't put everything on yourself. People that you are close to and trust, actually do want to help! *This is not a ticket to be a bridezilla though. Really appreciate people that want to help you and don't overload one person! Pick and choose things to delegate wisely.

7. Look for dress sales! This is key. Some brides spend more on their dress than we did on our entire wedding! Although this is one of the most important aspects of your day, you can still find your dream dress at a dream price. My dress was from a local store that was going out of business. She had most all dresses 30% off and the owner was personable and amazing to work with. It arrived at the store on Tuesday and I was the first person to try it on that Saturday! It was the second dress I tried on, because I was set on a lace dress. But, the lace one, was horrific on me. Be open to trying on different styles :) My dress total was a whopping $345.00!!! It was perfect. Oh, and it had POCKETS!

                                                 Photo by Gretchen Lynn Robards

8. Don't pay 54783403 for a photographer. Pictures are definitely one of the most important parts, if not the most important, of the day, so this decision is vital. First, think about people you know. Look at their websites, even meet and talk with them! Sometimes they don't post their prices, because they can vary. See if their style matches what you BOTH want. Don't forget to include the groom ;) If you don't know anyone, and you want to budget the most on this, then definitely go with what you want! Seek out reviews. Read blogs! Sometimes photographers will have a second shooter, so it'd be worth paying more. See what the packages include and read the fine print of contracts! Make a list of all the pictures you want. Communicate that and see what would be realistic. This is an area to splurge if you can!

9. Use some fake flowers or grow them! Not all your flowers have to be real. Put them together yourself! It could be something fun to do with your bridesmaids! If that's scary for you, order your bouquet and use fake flowers for your bridesmaids, or something creative like cotton for the groomsmen. Online blogs and talented people you know would be a good source! If you want to grow them yourself, see what will grow when you want your wedding to be and go from there! For me, that seems terrifying, but maybe you have a green thumb. :) This decision will definitely depend on when you have your wedding and what your comfort level is! Ours were all fake for the ceremony and I now have my bouquet in a mason jar by our bed!

                                          Photo by Gretchen Lynn Robards

10. Make small things memorable. My sister made my garter and my handkerchief. This was incredibly special to use on the day and to have as a keep sake! My necklace was a graduation gift from my parents that had a simple round diamond from my great grandmother's ring. Maybe you don't have these things, but talk with family. See what options you have for your something borrowed, something old, something blue, and something new! The ceremony should reflect you both! You can "tweak" traditional things to make it your own. We did unity salt instead of sand, because we loved the symbolism it had with our gospel centered lives as being the Salt of the earth.  We also decided to have our parents stand beside us and give their blessing instead of my dad "giving" me away. Be creative! The ceremony is more special than some people make it out to be.

                                          Photo by Gretchen Lynn Robards

                                          Photo by Gretchen Lynn Robards

                                         
I know this doesn't address everything and in no way will this insure your wedding to be $3,000, but I hope it'll help anyone trying to plan their special day on a tight budget! For us, we could have spent more, but we didn't want to. It was a personal conviction to be good stewards of our money and focus on the marriage being the most important part, but don't feel badly for having a bigger budget! It's an important day that you've always dreamed of, which makes all this hard work worth it!  I hope and pray you have as many amazing people in your life to help and learn from as we did. We couldn't have done it without them! Thank you, thank you, thank you!!!

                                          Photo by Teia Squires Fuller

             
Oh, and don't forget to include your groom and in-laws! It's their day as much as it is yours! If you're a Christian, you're still called to Christlikeness even while you plan your wedding ;)

Happy planning and have fun!

A Servant's Heart

This morning, I had such a hard time waking up. Even with the help of sweet hugs from my husband, my eyes just did not want to open. So, I only had time to make the coffee. And to be honest, I was not happy getting out of our comfortable bed on my day off to do it.  After he left (later than normal), I felt convicted...

I didn't feel convicted, because Kyle expects me to do things for him every morning...he doesn't at all. I didn't even act grumpy! I felt convicted, because of where my heart was. If we all were honest, we would probably say that 90% of the time we catch ourselves grumbling about "having" to do something for someone (maybe not 90%, but you know I mean). And even though we're human...it doesn't make it right. For those of us who are Christians, we are called to love others...as we love ourselves! Galatians 5:13-14, "For you were called to freedom, brothers. Only do not use your freedom as an opportunity for the flesh, but through love serve one another. For the whole law is fulfilled in one word: “You shall love your neighbor as yourself.” Notice the word freedom. We have a choice! We can feel freedom in choosing to love others. We can avoid feeling burdened or inconvenienced.

 We are given the privilege to love others, because of the love that Christ showed us! How do we show love? Service. *Insert fireworks and massive display of loud cheering* But for real...this is huge. This is countercultural. So, in a culture that is driven by "what's in it for me," I encourage you (and myself) to redirect your heart from selfish grumblings to selfless serving. Give without expecting. Have a servant's heart. Truly Love, because you are loved so much.

-"Even as the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many."
Matthew 20:28 

I want to give a shout out to a couple that's in our church. Kyle and I don't know them very well, but they have such an amazing story of service. I just had to share :) Pray for them. Give to them. My heart is full of praises for what God is doing through them.

Here's where you can give! Also, go and "like" their Facebook page.
http://www.indiegogo.com/projects/322998/
http://www.facebook.com/OneHeartAfrica?group_id=0

Peace,
Megan

"What Are You Chasing?"

Last weekend I went on a much needed girls retreat with my Sojourn ladies to a cabin in Pigeon Forge. It was pure bliss. We had amazing food (junk food included!), played a crazy game in which I have a love/hate relationship with, had great conversation,  and worshiped through an insanely good study and discussions. It was the definition of retreat and I had no idea just how much I needed it until the ride home...

I don't know about you, but riding in a car makes me think. I can't tell you why, but my mind goes 90 miles a minute (If I'm not sleeping!).  Maybe it can be traced back to my childhood...my Mom and I would have deep discussions while running errands, and still do! Now Kyle and I have some of the deepest and most meaningful conversations in our car. So naturally, I was thinking away on our ride back. The question, "What are you chasing," from our study, Chase, kept coming to my mind. All of my answers could be summed up with one word-- perfection.

                            *picture from http://www.rachelpapo.com/images/perfect/

We all want to be good at whatever we do, but sadly we have adopted our society's perception of success and taken it into every aspect of our lives. Perfection. I just cringe at that word. Even the majority of churches expect this. It has made us selfish. It has made us fake. It created the "I'm doing great, how are you," society. I'm not on the end of the spectrum, saying that we shouldn't care how we perform at work, or not care about being the best friend, sister, wife, husband, mother or father, etc. that we can be...I'm saying we shouldn't be obsessed with being perfect. 

From a Biblical perspective, the Bible is full of flawed ordinary people that God used in amazing ways. They were a far cry from being flawless and even continued to mess up! David was an adulterer and murderer. What makes us any different? We mess up too. For those of us who are Christians, we need to be reminded that even though we were created to be perfect, we live in a messed up world. We are messed up! Even our friends who don't believe, or don't believe the same as us, would more than likely affirm our imperfectness. Jennie Allen, author of Chase, said we were all built to chase...we all have a hole in us and we're looking to fill it. Look inside you and around you...this is so true. All the earthly things we chase will only feel good and last for a short while, then we're off chasing something else. What's so awesome, is that God wants to fill that hole, even though we're flawed and messed up. Even though we chase other things, but him. Ephesians 1:4-6 says,

"In love he predestined us for adoption as sons through Jesus Christ, according to the purpose of his will, to the praise of his glorious grace, with which he has blessed us in the Beloved." 

To me, this is mind-blowing. We were not chosen for who we were, but because we were loved! So that word I've been using a ton...we don't have to be that!  We cannot change God. We cannot change others. But, He can. Even in our doubts, He can! So, be honest with yourself and with others. "What are you chasing,"...Legalism? Wealth? Attention? All the answers? Maybe you're not even chasing anything...not sure what to believe. Recognizing those things is huge! Recognizing helps us seek. You know what's comforting...even in those moments, we are equipped and loved. I can't help but think about the scene in Home Alone where Kevin faces his fear and yells, "Hey! I'm not afraid anymore! I said, I'm not afraid anymore! Do you hear me? I'm not afraid anymore!" Even though he went inside scared, he still faced it. That's totally me right now. I'm not afraid anymore! Even thought I'm sure I'll have moments of fear, I can still say that I can step off my pedestal, not be afraid of failure, and start really chasing what matters- Him. 

*If you're interested in Jennie's Study, Chase, here is her blog :) 

http://jennieallen.com/blog/

A Graceful Year

I intentionally waited for New Years Eve to write my first ever blog post. I've wanted to document being a newlywed, new resident in Chattanooga, new dog owner, job hunter, and more, but it never felt like the right time, especially since the new year was so close! So, alas, here I am now and instead of holding a pin and paper making resolutions and new goals...I'm drinking coffee and reflecting. Sure, resolutions and goals can be good things, but really and truly, what are they if we don't reflect and have reasons behind them. Maybe then, we could actually achieve them (mainly talking to myself here...)!

Before this year, I really had no idea how much could happen in 365 days! I worked at a great school, made life-time friends, started going to a church plant (Covenant), married my best friend, gained countless new family members, changed my last name, lived in my first apartment, our precious nephew, Abram was born, two new cousins were born, my amazing parents celebrated another year of marriage, Kyle was offered a steady job with the Wooden Law Firm, we moved to Chattanooga, started going to another church plant (Sojourn Chattanooga), we celebrated 6 years of dating, I started a part-time job at Bridge Salon, we got a sweet puppy, my family moved from our home of 23 years,  my great grandpa turned 96, we accepted to become community group leaders for Sojourn, Kyle and I enjoyed our first married Christmas together, and we (along with our family and her friends) successfully surprised my much deserving mother-in-law for her birthday. 

Now that I am finished gasping for air and recovered from my head spinning, I can say that I couldn't be more blessed. Every single thing that happened (good and bad) couldn't be more beautiful. Yes, beautiful. In each circumstance I have felt and witnessed peace that cannot be explained...support and love from people that I cherish dearly...and truly learned what healing, restoration, and God's grace means. In turn, I got a little taste of what life really means. It's not about myself, what I abstain from or living up to expectations that people place on me...it's about really living out Truth. It's not sitting in church pews every Sunday and Wednesday, saying churchy phrases, or doing kind things to make myself feel better...it is about living life with people and loving them unconditionally with every ounce of love that Christ shows me...(no matter what religion, race, or sexual orientation) which is with every fiber in my being. I strive daily not to live in shame or guilt or place that on others. I am no better than anyone else. Praise God for this revelation! 

For far too long, I knew these things, but really didn't feel them. What good was the knowledge I had, if I did not change my heart? In truth, I was living a lie. Gross. Reality is harsh sometimes, huh, but out of that I learned to cling to the Truth and the grace that He gives me every day, because it is truly sufficient. We can never earn His love. It is already there. Talk about a humbling reality. To sum up everything; I am not bound to anything, but Christ and there is no greater freedom than the freedom that He gives! That, my friends, is something I wish I had learned many years ago, but I am super thankful I have now. What. A. Year. 

So with all that reflecting, I actually do have a resolution. I want to be more humble and intentional with everything in life, including with this blog. I hope it will keep me accountable and maybe help or entertain (even I admit I do dumb things from time to time...Like scanning an item at Target under a fire extinguisher...*COUGH *COUGH) others along the way. :) 

Peace, 
Megan